The Division of Responsibility in Feeding: A Game-Changer for Picky Eating

If mealtimes at your house feel like a never-ending battle, you’re not alone. Many parents struggle with picky eating and the stress that comes with it. Should you push your child to eat? Should you make them take "just one more bite"? What if they refuse an entire meal?

This is where the Division of Responsibility in Feeding (sDOR) comes in—a game-changing approach that helps reduce mealtime stress and supports your child in developing a healthy relationship with food.

What Is the Division of Responsibility in Feeding?

The Division of Responsibility in Feeding (sDOR) was developed by Ellyn Satter, a registered dietitian and feeding expert. It provides clear roles for both parents and children during mealtimes:

🔹 Parents decide:
✔ What food is served
✔ When food is served
✔ Where food is served

🔹 Children decide:
✔ Whether they eat
✔ How much they eat

By sticking to these roles, parents can create a pressure-free environment where kids feel safe to explore new foods at their own pace.

Why This Approach Works for Picky Eaters

Many picky eaters resist food because they feel pressured to eat. When kids sense that mealtimes are about control (“Eat your broccoli, or no dessert!”), they push back. The Division of Responsibility shifts the focus to trust and autonomy, which helps children become more adventurous eaters over time.

Here’s why it works:
✅ Less pressure = Less resistance. When kids aren’t forced to eat, they’re more likely to try new foods.
✅ Predictability builds comfort. Regular meal and snack times help kids feel secure in knowing when food is available.
✅ Encourages self-regulation. Kids learn to listen to their hunger and fullness cues, setting them up for lifelong healthy eating habits.

How to Put the Division of Responsibility Into Practice

1️⃣ Serve balanced meals with at least one safe food. This way, your child always has something they’re comfortable eating.
2️⃣ Stick to set meal and snack times. Avoid grazing throughout the day so your child comes to meals hungry and ready to eat.
3️⃣ Keep mealtime neutral. Avoid bribing, pressuring, or making comments like “You have to eat three bites.”
4️⃣ Model positive eating behaviors. Eat a variety of foods yourself—kids learn by watching you!
5️⃣ Trust your child’s appetite. Some days they’ll eat more, some days less, and that’s okay!

Common Parent Concerns

💬 "What if my child only eats bread or refuses everything?"
Continue serving balanced meals and include at least one preferred food. Over time, exposure without pressure encourages variety.

💬 "What if they don’t eat enough?"
Children are great at regulating their hunger when we let them. Trust their cues—if they’re truly hungry, they’ll eat!

💬 "What if they never try new foods?"
They will—eventually! Keep offering new foods in a no-pressure way. It can take 10-15 exposures before a child feels comfortable trying something new.

Final Thoughts

The Division of Responsibility in Feeding takes the stress out of mealtimes for both parents and children. When kids feel in control of their eating, they’re more open to exploring new foods and developing a healthy relationship with food that lasts a lifetime.

If you’re struggling with picky eating and want more personalized support, I’d love to help! Book a free consultation, and let’s create a plan that works for your family.